the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
