When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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