Are we in a gay sports bar?
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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