Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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