i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
