VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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