You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
