I can't watch pbs sober anymore
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize