Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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