Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
