Sry I called you an 8
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Randomize