i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
