I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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