You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
