I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
