so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
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