remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Randomize
