drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
