i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
