I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
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she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
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Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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