You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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