That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Farmville is her only friend.
bring money and cleavage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize