If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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