I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize
