I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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