normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
