The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
