I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
