I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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