Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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