I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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