hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
as a side note pls kill me
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
