My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
