the new term for farting is butt boxing.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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