I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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