Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
