How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Randomize
