I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
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