two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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