Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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