____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
