We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
wow bdsm is so cute
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
