I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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