There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
