This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
