I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize
