That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
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