Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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