I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
