We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize