I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
