singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I supernannyed him into submission
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